Monday, August 26, 2013

things I hate about breastfeeding

Let me just say, before I begin... I am incredibly grateful that I can breast feed and have been blessed with enough supply etc to be able to do so with relative ease.

That said, here's the shit that sucks about breast feeding:

1. Boob leakage. Yeah. My boobs leak. As in whenever they want so I have to walk around with boob pads or else I end up with big wet circles on my shirts. Or worse, a wet spot on the bed because I was so tired after feeding in the middle of the night that I forgot to put the pads back on....

2. Having to get up in the wee hours of the morning, stumble around and feed a squalling infant. Enough said.

3. Blocked ducts. That's right, not only do your boobs have ducts, they get backed up so you have to massage that shit (milk) out. And it ain't pleasant. Oh no. And it's messy (at least for me) because it means letting milk dribble out until you get the lump out and free. Which for me usually means, yay, spray!

 4. Porn star boobs that are good for nothing. As in don't even think about touching them. They hurt and they're liable to leak! These girls have a mind of their own people and I'm not responsible for what they might do.

5. Speaking of porn star boobs: engorged breasts. As in, so full of milk they ache. But you don't want to pump it out because that might mean you'll make more milk, which only compounds the problem.

All in all, good times I tell you!


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