Thursday, July 10, 2014
I was sorting through files a while back and realized that she's actually 16 years old now. I adopted her in 1999 when she was 8 months old and she's been my home and family ever since.
Over the years she's changed and grown with me. But now she's getting to that point of no return. Recent problems have revealed that she has a degenerative kidney problem and that we need to put her on palliative medicine to help her kidneys function properly. It's not a cure, just a fix to help maintain her health/quality of life.
So now we play the wait and see game. Will the meds help? What is her overall health and comfort? When has the illness taken her to a point in time where it's time to let her go so that she's not suffering?
Don't get me wrong, I'm ok with it all, even though I'm sad, because I know she's had a good life; that I rescued her from an overcrowded SPCA in Victoria when she was a sickly little thing that most people would have walked past. But I saw her in that cage, rubbing up against my hand, so very much in need of love and affection and my heart was hers. She has been the being that I have come home to now for 15 years.
I hope that despite the little monster that I have brought into her life, you know, the one who just is so excited about her but doesn't understand the concept of gentle yet and thus drives her crazy, that she will be healthy and happy in these last months/years. That I can ensure that when it's time to let her go, that she'll know that I love her deeply and that she has been my fixed point in the sea of change that has marked my life since leaving home.
Labels: friends and family